Life on the Frontline – week 38

lotfA weekly blog from a family made by adoption, warmed by the laughter, broken by the sadness, held together by love with a big dollop of hope, oh, and often soaked in mummy tears.

On Monday we had a full blown school refusal, from Small, the first we’ve had in a long time. He simply did not want to go and therefore wouldn’t entertain any level of coercing or bribery.  So I had to leave it for a little while, to give us both the space we needed to think it through. I tried to pin point a trigger and work out a strategy to get him into school.

We eventually managed to get through the school gates but he refused to actually go in the building. His TA spotted us outside and came to see what was going on. Small took flight as soon as he saw her and ran out of the school gates and down the road. I stood and watched, unable (my foot was still sore) and unwilling to give chase. I was pretty certain I knew where I would find him.

I walked slowly towards the bushes which are central to a triangle of grass, just a little way from the school. I could see the vibrant colour of his school sweatshirt between the leaves. I must have looked slightly crazy, talking to a bush but these are the things we do.

“You must really not want to be in school today to have run away, I wonder what it is that you don’t want to do today.” I pondered.

“My parts too big, I don’t want it”

The previous Friday the children had auditioned for parts in the end of year six play. Small had landed one of the parts of Macbeth; the role was to be shared between six children.

“I’m really sure that we can do something about that, let’s go into school and talk about it”

“And we’ve got a different maths teacher today that I don’t like.”

“Well maybe you can do your maths in the corridor, like you sometimes do anyway”

He slowly emerged from the greenery and calmly walked back into school.

“I’m really proud of you for being able to tell me what scared you about today and I promise no one is going to be cross with you”. I comforted him.

Once in the school building he went to flee once more, however with a little calm reassurance he stopped, gradually coming to see that everything was ok.

When I picked him up later, he came out beaming and happy, the school day had been a success.

Tall has had an internal exclusion this week for swearing at a teacher. I have not been at all impressed with the way the situation has been handled and I am writing a letter, yes a letter, regarding the situation. I’ll maybe tell you more next week, when I’ve got a bit more clarity on the situation. However, I will say that the whole incident has obviously shaken Tall, again, and we had an incident of electronic device in his bed, late at night. I thankfully caught him before he was able to do anything, but it has renewed my vigilance over the location of devices. I’m back to taking everything upstairs at bedtime. Sometimes I have to do two trips because I can’t carry everything.

“You could open your own Tandy, with that lot” says my husband, nearly every night as he watches me juggle lap tops, tablets and phones, up two flights of stairs. He’s so hilarious.


 In Other News

Small decided, at the very last minute, to enter the local talent contest this week. It was a little against my better judgement because I felt he was a bit unprepared. However the boy is a natural and had the audience in stitches with his comedy performance, telling jokes and doing magic tricks.  He only went and won, which was super amazing for him and for me, I felt hugely proud.

I managed a really lovely evening out with a friend from school; we’ve not seen each other in almost fifteen years, so there was lots of catching up to do.

Small went to a sleep over this weekend with a new friend. It was lovely to hear from the mum how well he behaved and how lovely he had been.

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