Me & My Blog by The Boy’s Behaviour

me and my blog



The Boy’s Behaviour is written by Vicki, who adopted her son Mini, then became a birth mum to Dollop a few years later. This is why she blogs…




We got to our lowest point. That’s how it all began.

With this low point came the overwhelming need for help, and it wasn’t just a low point, we were critical I think. As Mini turned 5 he was no longer under the jurisdiction of the awful health visiting team, and so I approached our GP. This was the turning point for our family, and the moment when I decided to start recording the details of Mini’s behaviour, my feelings, and our family life.

I knew this would be a long journey, and I needed to write it down.

I’d been dipping in and out of Twitter, reading the odd blog – desperate to find others like us. I knew there must be others out there, and I wanted to read more than just 140 character snippets, or paragraph long forum posts. I found Sally Donovan’s blog, and after reading for a while, identifying with much of what she’d written, I knew that blogging was the way I wanted to go.

Blogging is amazing. I see it kind of like an open diary that I don’t mind if you read. It allows me to empty my head of all the crappiness, which lets me concentrate on the important stuff (and the boring daily stuff) I have to do. Writing it all down helps me order my thoughts and digest things. It enables me to share some really difficult times with people who care about us…I struggle to do that in real life, tending to put on a brave face instead.

I’ve encountered a few awful comments, I’ve had a small family argument after a post was misconstrued, I’ve had to consider risks to our identities, and I’ve had to think about how much I share and how Mini will feel when he reads it all someday. But mostly, I have found THE most supportive community ever.

This group of strangers is incredible. There is almost always someone on Twitter for me to talk to, or listen to. They read my blog and give advice, or just virtual hugs. I have found people that not only read, encourage and support, but they do so knowing how I feel, because most of them have had similar issues too. And amazingly, other people have read my blog and had to courage to reach out for more support for themselves. I’ve even been nominated for awards, and shortlisted for one too just for writing about my life…how incredible is that?!

I’ve become more than just another parent blogger. I’ve become one of a growing number of adoptive parents reaching out to each other via the internet. Some are fast-becoming good friends, and I’m looking forward to meeting many of them.

Along with writing The Boy’s Behaviour , Vicki is also co-founder of The Adoption Social. You can read more about Vicki on our contributors page, or on her blog. She’s also on Twitter @boysbehaviour and Facebook –

9 thoughts on “Me & My Blog by The Boy’s Behaviour

  1. Sally

    Me too. It has surprised me just how similar all our experiences are which can be a great comfort during difficult times.
    Keep writing – I love your blog and Adoption Social is a fantastic idea x

    1. tasocial Post author

      Thanks Sally. Your blog has been a great inspiration to me and has helped me through some of the more difficult times. Vicki x

  2. Helen - SaveEveryStep (family stories from past and present)

    That’s great. I’ll be following your blog. I have to admit that I have been debating whether to include our adoption story in my present blog, or whether to start a new one for that topic alone. We have ex-spouse abuse issues at times, and with the other obvious issues around identity protection in adoption, I would really love some more advice on how to blog and maintain secure levels of anonymity for the children.

    1. tasocial Post author

      Thanks for your reply Helen. We’ll see if we can get something written for The Adoption Social on maintaining security and anonymity. We have some tips on obscuring photos, but we could put something together on blogging too.
      Hope you like The Boy’s Behaviour 🙂 Vicki x

  3. elainepinkerton

    Dear Vicki: I love your post (so glad I discovered your site!) As an adult adoptee who has written several books centered on adoption issues and currently writing a novel whose protagonist is an adoptee, I’m always looking for new perspectives. Yours is helpful and inspiring. Keep writing and count me as one of your fans!


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