We realise that it is sometimes hard for adopters to talk about certain topics through their blogs or Twitter for many reasons.
It is the same for adopted people and adoption professionals. We are going to be featuring contributions from anonymous writers in our new TOP SECRET feature.
If you would like to contribute please contact us by email or direct message on Twitter? You just need to email us a submission of up to 2000 words max. There must be no identifying names or places in any submissions. No names will be shared.
This first contribution is from ADOPTER X who will be contributing regularly to the TOP SECRET feature as an adopter.
EXPERIENCE ALTERS PERSPECTIVE
I find I have more in common with X’s parents than I ever thought possible. We adopted X when she was four and it’s been a strange journey that we have been taken on. Due to increasingly challenging behaviour, violence, self-harm, knife fights and more we, eventually, self-referred to Children’s Social Care. All well and good, they came and did their initial assessments and declared that we were doing more than they could provide, so ‘chin up’ and carry on. We did just that. All that changed when someone else referred us and the Children’s Social Care arrived uninvited. The Social Workers that came were different, hard, uninterested in our story or explanation with no regard for case notes or history. They had a job to do and got on with it with no interest in our version of events or explanations the embodiment of agents of the state. It was not a nice experience. Experience alters perspective. I find myself revising the things I’ve read about X’s parents. I think of a young mother caught up in the child protection system that I was caught up in. I think of phrases I read like ‘combative’ and ‘not engaging’ then think of phrases that may be used to describe me as I pushed back against the injustices I felt and the unyielding bureaucracy that unfolded before me. I think of the terrifying thought of losing X and thought of a young mum who lost her child. I feel closer to her than I ever thought possible, a shared experience with different outcomes and different start points but with some shared paths. As I say experience alters perspectives. When I was a member of an adoptive panel I read Child Protection Report after Child Protection Report with the same threads and patterns repeated again and again. Now, I find myself revisiting those stories in my mind, I see a system that removes children from parents, often justifiably so, where I once saw the system as neutral and fair I’m not so sure now. I know that I’m not the only adopter to slip onto the wrong side of the tracks. I do know that this experience has altered my perspective forever and I feel empathy and have an insight to X’s family that I never thought I could have.
I am Adopter X, the adopter of X
X came as a bundle of joy and tears when she was three and now she’s a teenager. Every day is hard, many days have joy and many still have tears.
It’s week 200 for The Weekly Adoption Shout Out!
That’s 200 weeks of adoption blogging since the #WASO began!
We can’t quite believe it and a very huge thanks to all the amazing contributors over the past few years.
Please do link up your blogs for this special edition.
As usual there is an optional theme which is “How the blogging community has supported me”. If you prefer just add your latest post or your top post from the last 200 weeks. We always read and share blogs individually. This week we will be promoting our special 200 week edition more widely so do join in.
We are back to our regular blog shout out after some recent admin changeovers. Our 199th week will be extended to March 19th when we are looking forward to a theme of celebrating 200 weeks of adoption blogs on The Adoption Social.
For this shout out there is no theme so please link up your blogs and we will share them over the next few weeks”
Hello to all our readers.
The Adoption Social is an amazing community resource that we have built up over many years. In that time we have been determined that it would be open to all those affected by adoption and not be commercially sponsored so that it truly belongs to the community and has freedom of speech and diverse opinion built in.
We have been proud and amazed as founders at the response to the website and particularly to the Weekly Adoption Shout Out. Contributors have shared with honesty and openness and in doing so have supported and informed not only other adoptees, adopters and foster carers but also professionals on the the many and complex aspects of adoption.
After much deliberation we have decided it’s time for us to move on and give our precious spare time to our families and to our own #SelfCare
The Open Nest Charity has always supported The Adoption Social and we are also trustees of the charity. With that in mind we are handing over the reins and editorship to the charity. The website, Facebook and Twitter will carry on as it always has. It will also have a permanent place on the new Open Nest website which is being launched in March.
We hope to continue with contributing ourselves and will be reading contributions as always. Thank you all for your support and please do keep contributing to keep the important resource going.
With much love
Vicki and Sarah
Welcome to the final #WASO of 2016!
Yes, that’s right, now the schools are breaking up we’ve decided to make this one loooooong #WASO over the Christmas period. So it’ll start today – 16 December, and will run until 6th January 2017.
If you need a break over Christmas, then come here, have a read and know that you’re in fine company. Or perhaps write about what’s going on in your house.
Here’s the linky:
Welcome to our first #WASO in December and the build up to Christmas.
How are you all feeling about the Christmas session? I’;m sure it will provide you all with plenty to write about. For those here to read I hope you will all find a read that helps you in some way with your own family life.
So adoption bloggers link up below and then remember to read and share.
A wintery welcome back to the Weekly Adoption Shout Out!
Get your best, worst, favourite, fun, ranty or informative blog posts at the ready and link up below to the original adoption linky – The Weekly Adoption Shout Out!
If you’re not sure how to join in, then check out this post.
Please comment and share if you can, and support your fellow bloggers. Here’s the linky:
Hello, hello, hello – welcome to the Weekly Adoption Shout Out!
Welcome back to another week of #WASO. How has this last week been? Have you written about it? Because if you have, then we want to read about it. Here’s an idea…link up below and then others who are interested in adoption will see it and might read it too? Sounds simple but it works!
We’d love for you to comment and share those you read too, and let them know you found them via #WASO. Here’s the linky:
Oh yes, it’s #WASO time!!
Come and join us at the original adoption blogging link-up – add your posts to the form below, and have a read of those who have already joined in.
If you need a hand with taking part then you’ll find some handy instructions here.