There must be some sweet pastured place
Where creeks sing on and tall trees grow
Some Paradise where horses go.
For by the love that guides my pen
I know great horses live again.
Have you met the birth parents of your child? @LisaKobeJ would like some advice on this difficult situation.
For many adopters this is one of the biggest hurdles to face, pre-adoption and in the early days, meeting the birth parents. For some cases, where a child’s life is threatened by identifying a future family, it obviously doesn’t happen, but, for many it is encouraged by your social worker. Having done it myself, I know it is the most bizarre and insane situation you can find yourself in, meeting the person who’s children will, hopefully ,soon be calling you mum or dad.
How do we deal with this meeting? What do you ask? What should you expect?
Have you been through this?
How was it?
Did you decide against it?
Was it a positive experience?
We have some questions from those about to embark on this situation which you might be able to answer. Please help other adopters and prospective adopters by sharing in the comments below.
What sort of questions should I be asking birth parents?
How much information about my child should I be sharing – he has been placed 7 months now and was 15 months on placement so has changed quite a bit.
Should I allow SW to introduce me by my first name?
SW has suggested having a photo of me and birth mum, is this a good idea?
We live within 20 miles of BM, whilst this isn’t particularly local there are other reasons why we might find ourselves in the same area, should this cause me any concern?
Please remember how alone being an adoptive parent can sometimes feel. Here your experiences can help others, so share. If you prefer you can contact @LisaKobeJ with your responses to her questions.